Day 4 (10/05/08) 9:35 am

"I really miss you a lot. We're not doing anything for most of the day today because it's Sunday. Some people are a t church- others are basically on personal time. I straightened my locker a little more- it's pretty much inspection ready except that we haven't packed our ruck sacks yet. I'm kind of disheartened today. I wonder if it's all the free time. When we're busy working, drilling, training, and doing PT, there isn't time to miss you. Maybe that's why I'm always trying to find things to do in my free time- so I don't miss you and Abbie and Sophia so much. I hope you're doing well and taking care of yourself while I'm not there to take care of you. I wish you were here to take care of me! Have you gone to your doctors appointment yet? If not, you need to schedule it. You should call your old doctor and ask if they accept Tricare. I love the pictures I brought of you and Abbie. My favorite two are 1: of you and me in Mexico with your green shirt on- you look so beautiful, and 2: of Abbie in my yellow LXA jersey/ t-shirt. I think it's suck a cute picture.

I wish I had my books. They're in my personal bag, which will be lock up until I get out, I think. Except I kept that little US Constitution booklet. It was an accident, but I'm glad I at least have something to read. The 2 books we have are just training manuals and are very dry and not very well written or edited. I did get to start Eragon though! Or Brisingr, I should say. I got to about page 160 at reception.

I'm tired of being screamed at and sursed all the time. It gets really old, especially since I'm smarter than these people (not in military matters, though, of course) and I'm too smart for their games- I know what they're up to. Although even still, then can certainly be intimidating and make you flustered sometimes0 they're good at their jobs in that regard. What a nightmare to be a drill sergeant- why would anyone want to? To let off steam after going to war maybe, I don't know. The insulting degradation gets old. It's already wearing on me. I'm used to professionals who respect each other. The Army- or the ISG & Battery Commander talk about that a lot- respect and all, but they're kind of full of shit in that regard.

Anyway, enough of me whining, you don't want to hear about that stuff and I need to keep up my attitude- I'm just a little down with all this free time, missing you. I'm kind of latching on to things that are familiar. Maybe that's why I've been talking about food so much (I'm hungry by the way). Also- get ready, this is really weird- I have, subconsciously, begun saying y'all. It's freaking me out. This place is more foreign that France was. I'm so excited to get a couple of weeks at home with you for Christmas! Usually you would just go to the next duty station with no break. Someone just mentioned sick call--I need to go get a "cold pack". I have a small cold. They cought on to a lot of tricks here- you can't buy cough drops (people use them like candy) and you can't sleep on top of your covers or sleep in the next days clothes (quicker in the morning to not have to make the bed or change). We wake up at 0430 and have to be dressed with the whole 64-person bay cleaned and our faces shaved by 0500. I've heard people say DS's lighten up some after about 2 weeks. I hope so- the PT, punishment exercise, etc. hasn't beed too bad (although not easy) but just the environment of trying to fuck people up and going out of the way to search for it and derogatory treatment is shitty for me. I guess the point is you need to be perfect and do exactly as instructed because in war not doing so could kill you; we are training for war.

I think our group is doing well together because many more of us are over 21 than most other platoons. We have one prior service guy from the Air Force, who has been a good leader so far and will be a great benefit to this platoon. Another specialist and I are also stepping up as leaders, but most of us are taking care of business. The guy from the Air Force is pretty cool, he sounds just like Vin Diesel! We're always having him quotes the Fast and the Furious.

So I say my locker is about ready for inspection, but I'm sure the DS will throw all of my shit on the floor for something that he didn't show us. I'm starting to get a headache from my cold- The DS said we should be back from sick call if we go tomorrow to still make the mandatory training event, but I don't want to risk it. If you miss a mandatory event you have to make it up on a Sunday or recycle. I hope my headache goes away or at least doesn't get worse for our march tomorrow. I want to lie down and sleep. I'm sitting on a window sill with my feet on my bed right now- I'm on the top bunk. We're supposed to go to the little PX this week- I need shower shoes, so that will be good. I'm bored. I miss you. I'm really surprised at how much junk food they have at meals. I don't know why they have any, really. They offer cheeseburgers and fries and dessert and soda at every lunch and dinner. I tried some Dr. Pepper yesterday at dinner and was really excited because it was finally working (sodas are conveniently not working a lot of the time) but when I drank it, I was surprisingly disappointed. That's probably because I've been eating so well. I have a salad at every lunch and dinner with 2 cherry tomatoes and usually have at least 2 vegetable sides at each meal, usually mashed potatoes, carrots or peas (in addition to the salad).

I had so much fun with you on our date before I left. I would love a good cigar and bottle of red wine right now. Oh, don't get your hopes up, because I'm thinking whoever said this is full of it, but I heard someone say we get to leave for Thanksgiving. It's only a few days from graduation anyway, but if I hear anything else indicatiing I could see you, I'll let you know.

Have you received any official information about military benefits etc? Also the Btry Cmdr. said they send weekly emails if they have your e-mail address- I'm not sure if they ask me for it or if they send you a request but that might be interesting- save them if you get them so that I can check them out.

It's 11:03, I don't think chow is until 1200. I think I'm going to try to take a quick nap. About 8:30- 2030 now. I'm feeling a lot better- have been since after lunch. Maybe I was tired and grumpy or something. We didn't get smoked a single time today and our DS was pretty cool all day. I'm starving right now. I have fire gaurd tonight- BUT only for 30 mins. That's only partly good- As a platoon, we have decided to wake up 30 mins early so that we have enough time to clean. I'm against that of course, but it that's what the majority wants, I'm going with it. Hence it beig both good and bad that my fire watch is only 30 mins. So we have out first march tomorrow and get our first MRE- should be a pretty good day, we're all looking forward to it. DS said today we'll get about 15ish minutes on our cell phones beginning in week 4 every Sunday as long as we don't screw ouselves.

This morning the mail bin was almost 1/2 full. A LOT of mail- it's already that full again- everybody really wants to start getting mail from loved ones- the guy across from me just said he's really missing his wife- I know the feeling. I lost a sock, it's probably in the drier, but I don't want to go downstairs to check for it- it's only a dress sock- you wear them under boot socks to reduce blisters. For our march, we are not wearing our IBA or ACH, I think (bullet proof vest & army combat helmet). Only the utility vest and lightly filled ruck sack. Won't be bad. I love you so much. Can't wait to see you."